It seems as though the Law & Order franchise is having a hard time keeping its actors these days. The Criminal Intent series has had three different female detective counterparts for Chris Noth's character since 2005, and last spring the original series lost Fred Thompson to his failed (phew!) presidential campaign. Then, in late February, RENT alum Jesse L. Martin announced that he was also leaving the series after eight seasons. Now, TVGuide.com is reporting that Diane Neal, who plays Assistant District Attorney Casey Novak on Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, will be stepping down at season's end.

Photo credit: Virginia Sherwood/NBC

Citing "new opportunities," Neal will be leaving her post as the second ADA on SVU after five seasons. She came onto the show in 2003 following the staged death of Stephanie March's character, Alexandra Cabot. It has not yet been revealed how Novak will be written off the show, but I sincerely hope she isn't killed off. If I am denied the possibility of her coming back — even for one episode — I will be one very unhappy lesbian.

When thinking of Neal's character, one particular episode from season 7, "Blinded" comes to mind. While prosecuting a schizophrenic rapist, Novak's hard exterior softens because of the history with her former fiancé's schizophrenia. Near the end of the episode, Det. Olivia Benson (Mariska Hargitay) realizes what she has done and confronts her; Novak shows no remorse. … continue reading

I don't think too much about dating, these days. I've haven't been single for a while and have no desire or plan to be single again. But when I saw Entertainment Weekly's list of “TV Characters You'd Date,” I asked my girlfriend and a couple of friends to play the who-would-you-date game. My girlfriend chimed in immediately with Dana Fairbanks. (I was not surprised. She's mentioned her before.) One friend led with Olivia Benson (Law and Order: SVU) and followed up with Tasha Williams (The L Word) and Diane Russell (NYPD Blue). The other shared that Kris Munroe (Charlie's Angels) was her first love (and the one against which all subsequent loves have been measured). And then she threw in Mary Bradford (Eight Is Enough) and C.J. Lamb (L.A. Law) for good measure..

And, of course, I made my own list. Which got very long. Here are but a few.

Liz Lemon — 30 Rock

This one is so obvious that I almost feel stupid explaining it. Smart is hot. Funny is hot. And hot is hot. Even though she might eventually send me looking for my own “lady Steadman,” I would not pass up the chance to date Liz Lemon.

Alice Pieszecki — The L Word

Once again, smart + funny + hot = an obvious choice. She's out and proud, and I like that in a woman. Alice did, however, have a lot of competition for my affections. On pure physical attraction (plus major smarts), I'd probably go with Bette. But she cheats, and I don't like that in a woman. Then there's Tasha. Swoon. And Carmen. Swoon. But I think I would laugh most with Alice, so there you go.

Alex Cabot — Law and Order: SVU … continue reading

In this week's countdown of dumb celebrity and entertainment news, we cover the outing of Dumbledore, moms cashing in on their celebrity daughters' fame, and Law and Order: Criminal Intent's wonderful contribution to the canon of evil, psychotic lesbians on TV (for more background on that, read Malinda's 2005 overview on Lesbian and Bisexual Women on Law and Order).

You may notice this week's episode is a little shorter than usual. That's wasn't intentional, it just worked out that way this time given the topics we had to work with. And the fact that Lori accidentally erased the video of some of our first takes, so we had to rant about the same topics a few times, and we somehow got more succinct along the way. We won't let that happen again! Next week we promise to be get back to our usual long, rambling rants.

(If you can't wait that long, check out Friday's She Made Me Watch This, where there's plenty of ranting and rambling). … continue reading

Watch it here now:

Last night's episode of Law and Order: Special Victims Unit was not as bad as I expected. It contained a number of features that could have made it bad — a special guest star, a disabled child, a terrorism subplot — but I managed to watch the whole thing without uttering, “I hate this show.”

And that's the main thing that makes me sad about SVU: It's best assessed these days in degrees of bad.

I take no pleasure in derogating the only network show I watch religiously. (Mariska Hargitay is just too lovely to abandon.) But the show tries my patience. A lot. Although I was initially reluctant to watch “the rape show,” I eventually got into it and have remained faithful. But the show seems to have forsaken its loyal viewers.

Here's why the show makes me sad.

5. There are too many special guest stars.

Special guest stars are an indication of jumping the shark, and SVU is definitely guilty of abusing this practice. Almost every episode features one. (Last night's was Aidan Quinn. Last week it was Melissa Joan Hart.) Sometimes they're good. Cynthia Nixon did a creditable job a few weeks ago. (Here's a clip.) But there are just too many of them. Did we really need Bob Saget, or Jerry Lewis as Munch's homeless uncle? … continue reading

As a person who gorges herself daily on a smorgasbord of pop culture (thank heavens for gossip antacids, they’re a real lifesaver), it’s the rare day that something slips past my plate. So imagine my surprise when I read, belatedly, that Alicia Witt was joining Law & Order: Criminal Intent. How could I have missed that tasty morsel?

You remember Alicia Witt, right? She was the acerbic, red-haired daughter of flighty, drama-queen Cybill on the mid-'90s sitcom by the same name. No, not ringing any bells? Cybill wore a silk bathrobe a lot. Still no? Fine. But if you do remember the show you, like me, are probably wishing The L Word had asked Alicia to join the cast instead of Cybill Shepherd. (Before you judge, it’s not the age thing. It’s the over-the-top, scenery-chewing thing. OK, sure, the red hair helps.) … continue reading

Apparently producing on Broadway and acting in two regular television gigs didn't slow Tamara Tunie down one bit. This Sunday, the Law & Order: SVU talent stepped behind the camera to start direction on her first feature, See You in September. I don't care about September — Tunie can see me whenever she wants.

The indie romantic comedy is about a successful Manhattanite who organizes a support group for abandoned therapy patients when her own analyst takes an unexpected month of vacation; Estella Warren and Justin Kirk (Weeds) star. … continue reading

In Sunday's New York Times, an article titled "In the Prime of Their Time" focused on older actresses on TV. Here are the (kind of silly) opening lines:

"Botox and plastic surgery allow actress to look younger. Television is permitting them to act their age. Older stars who once had to resign themselves to playing frustrated spinsters or docile moms are suddenly flaunting their ripened sex appeal on television. It's not 'The Roman Spring of Mrs. Stone' anymore. This season marks the summer of hot cougar love."

Let's all take a moment to roll our eyes at the "cougar" thing. OK, done? Anyway, the first name mentioned in the article is, of course, Kyra Sedgwick's — The Closer starts its third season today (TNT, 9/8c). But Sedgwick's character, Deputy Police Chief Brenda Johnson, is dating someone age-appropriate, so the rest of the article focuses on some saucier pairings.

Too bad this photo of Holly Hunter and Laura San Giacomo doesn't actually depict a couple. They're just co-stars, in Saving Grace, which premieres July 18 on TNT. Hunter plays a cynical cop with a touched-by-an-angel-ish shot at redemption.

… continue reading