Aw, look: it's Cady Heron, all alone at the lunch table, shunned by those horrible Plastics.

Cady looks different — older, wiser and, gayer.

Wait a second, that's not Cady Heron: That's Lindsay Lohan guest starring as Betty's arch nemesis, Kimmie, on Ugly Betty. Awesome!

I take my television seriously, so I mean it when I say it: Ugly Betty is good again, folks! … continue reading

I have to confess to taking the will-she-choose-Gio-or-Henry cliffhanger on last season’s Ugly Betty finale fairly seriously. Once I became a full-on Betty fan, it was hard not to fully invest myself in such Betty quandaries, so I was doubly pleased by the Kelly Taylor pick-between-Brandon-and-Dylan redux in Thursday’s season premiere: Betty, head held typically high, chooses herself!

More exciting for the coming Ugly BettyMode-land guest stars that Ugly Betty features. Most recently, according to Entertainment Weekly’s Ausiello Files, Sarah Lafleur of ESPN’s Playmakers, is set to join the ranks of previous guest stars and cameos by Lindsay Lohan, Naomi Campbell, Christian Siriano and Nina Garcia.

EW notes that Lafleur’s recurring character, Molly, will not only be fiancée to Meade’s CFO, but also a potential new crush for Daniel. Ugly Betty love triangles are oh-so-catty and deliver the over-the-top factor that fans have signed up for (even when they involve the slooowly developing and sometimes underwhelming character of Daniel), so I, for one, am excited about the prospect. … continue reading

Last week, when Republican presidential nominee John McCain named Sarah Palin as his running mate, reporters and bloggers immediately began calling the Alaskan governor a Tina Fey look-alike. Just the mention of Fey in relation to the White House sent millions of people into fantasy overload as they began pondering what Fey's 30 Rock character, Liz Lemon, would make of being America's vice president.

Fantasizing about a fictional character as vice president is ridiculous, of course. If you're going to fantasize, why not go all the way and envision a full-on dream president!

Our Lesbian Scientistics team vetted a dozen female television characters for president this week. We've narrowed down our choices to four. First, we'll offer you a sampling of their stances on various issues, by sharing quotes straight from their mouths. Then we'll see how they measure up against one another. Then, of course, you can vote for one of them in the comments. (Or write in your own choice!)

LESBIAN SCIENTISTICS POTUS CANDIDATES:

Wilhelmina Slater, Ugly Betty

Administration appointments: "That is the absolute cruelest thing I've ever seen. Someone's getting a raise!"

Minimum wage: "Who do you think denied you a raise for the past two years? Cut your vacation time? Who do you think hacked into your computer and canceled your subscription to DudeCruise?"

Global warming: "Snow is a magical blanket — it hides what's ugly and makes everything beautiful." Foreign policy:

Wilhelmina: "Mark, I need you to go down to the closet and tell the drunken Irish woman to bring out my gown for the Halloween Ball."
Mark: "She's Scottish actually."
Wilhelmina: "Don't care."

Economy: "Poor people are so cheap."

Race relations: "Let's not talk around it like a couple of dull white people." … continue reading

For a show that reported an entire season's worth of dismal ratings last year, The CW's Gossip Girl sure knows how to create a media buzz. In late April, Gossip Girl released a poster featuring Blake Lively's, character Serena Van der Woodsen, in the, er, throes of passion. Either that or she was about to let out an astronomical sneeze. The only text on the poster was a simple, but succinct "OMFG." The Parents Television council was outraged, calling The CW to task for using, "cleavage kissing to hype a kids' show."

I love the Gossip Girl marketing team because they never peddle the show as anything other than exactly what it is: a tawdry, teenage soap opera. (Which I watch, diligently.)

To hype season 2, the folks over at The CW released another round of posters similar to the "OMFG" set. There's a lot of skin, and some simple quoted text. "Every parent's nightmare," from The Boston Herald. "A nasty piece of work," from the The New York Post. And my personal favorite, from The Parents Television Council: "Mind-blowingly inappropriate."

After giving these ads a hearty round of applause, I got to thinking about other marketing campaigns. What if all network television shows went with this advertising approach, and turned the criticism of The Parents Television Council into their taglines? The results would look like — well, they'd look just like this: … continue reading

It’s been three months, to the day, since our last Betty Suarez pratfall. Three months, to the day, since our last Wilhelmina Slater cocked eyebrow. Three months, to the day, since our last Mandy and Marc madness. I think it’s safe to say, we’re all ready for Betty, wouldn’t you? Ugly Betty returns to the air tonight with its first post-strike episodes, and not a moment too soon.

All photos courtesty of ABC/Vivian Zink

The campiest show on television is back for five all new episodes. The series will pick up on Betty’s 24th birthday. What can we expect? Well, since this season has already seen a death, near-death, near-wedding, baby mama drama, baby daddy drama, artificial insemination, amnesia and Posh Spice, I’d say just more of the same old, same old.

In honor the return of America Ferrera and company, the terrible twosome of Becki Newton and Michael Urie (aka Mandy and Marc) have recorded the show’s first-ever video podcast. Yes they call it a “video podcast” and not the shorter, more succinct “vlog.” Gosh, is The L (Wrong) Word-iness contagious? Regardless the terminology, the clip is fun and now I cannot stop singing “Ready For Betty.” I really can’t. I’ve tried everything. … continue reading

Like my co-worker Karman said so poetically today, I'm "sick of having the cloying, traditionally heterosexual holiday crammed down [my] throat every year." But if I did celebrate Valentine's Day, I'd be pleased to get one of these lovelies in my box. Inbox! I meant inbox.

First, here's an awesome Alien-themed valentine that I really did get in my inbox this morning, from my very talented friend Andy Swist (click for a larger version):

Isn't cartoon Ripley foxy?

Next, here are a few Lost ecards from the ABC website:

I do trust you, Juliet, I do! … continue reading

I like to keep an eye on what the boys over at AfterElton are doing — and they’ve been raving about Ugly Betty for so long now, as one of the gay-friendliest shows on U.S. TV, that I figured I should check it out when it came over to the U.K. last year. While I can’t say I completely share their enthusiasm — the main gay character, Marc St. James, seems way too much like Jack from Will & Grace to me, and as such he isn’t exactly breaking any new ground — the show itself is fun, and quite sweet, and I would probably watch it quite happily, if it were not for one thing.

That one thing is Dulux, the international paint company that sponsors Ugly Betty in the U.K. Before every episode starts, and at the beginning and end of each advertising break, I have to watch another Dulux commercial. Now, normally this wouldn’t be a big deal — after all, you can just press the mute button and think about something else for five minutes — and perhaps I shouldn’t even be calling attention to this. But here’s an example of the Dulux ads that have been running recently in the U.K., on the theme of paint colors that are a “perfect match”: … continue reading

It's hard for me not to get excited when Salma Hayek's name gets connected to a project. The reasons are too numerous to count, but like many AfterEllen.com readers, I can resist neither her business savvy (lately earning Ugly Betty a new batch of nominations) nor her stunning presence (lately earning us photos like the one below).

For these reasons, I'm trying to imagine how this casting news will turn out to be good casting news: Hayek is set to play a bearded lady alongside vampire John C. Reilly in Cirque du Freak, a movie adaptation of the children's book series by Darren Shan. Paul Weitz will direct, which indicates it could go in the direction of American Pie (yikes!) or About a Boy (cheers!). That said, I don't know how Cirque's plot — centered on a battle between bloodsuckers and their rivals, the "Vampanese" — will fit the model of understated humor set by the latter Weitz picture. … continue reading

As Joan Jett sings, "You don't know what you got till it's gone." That's how I've been feeling about TV lately — new episodes seem so very precious because you know each one could be your last.

Yes, I'm exaggerating, and even if there were no strike, I'd be eagerly anticipating 30 Rock. Tonight, Edie Falco makes her last appearance as Jack's Democratic dish.

Meanwhile, on Ugly Betty, "real women" take to the runway and Annie Potts (Designing Women) plays a psychic. … continue reading

Is it Monday? No? It sure feels like it. So here's some eye candy to help while away the day.

1. Annie Leibovitz snaps Cate Blanchett on the set of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull:

I need that picture to be much, much bigger. (From Vanity Fair — see more here.)

2. All you need to know about Lost in 8 minutes and 15 seconds (ha): … continue reading

Whenever I see someone with one of those “Kill Your Television” bumper stickers, I feel two distinct emotions. One, shut up, Smuggy McSmugerson. I bet you don’t read the copies of The New Yorker in your bathroom either. And two, yeah, sometimes I do feel like taking a 12-gauge to the old idiot box. This year I got my usual mix of joy and pain from my television. The highs were so very fantastic. The lows so very sucktastic. Here's a rundown of my top and bottom five TV shows for 2007.

Five I Loved:

1) 30 Rock: Everything about this show, well, rocks. It’s smart, funny, geeky and good to the gays — just like its creator, Tina Fey. She is the antidote to the mediocrity that keeps trying to choke our culture into submission. This show alone is reason enough to own a television. … continue reading

Yesterday, the American Film Institute selected its 10 best films and TV shows of the year. Nobody gets to vote — there are no nominations, no names submitted for anyone's consideration. You might call the lists unilateral. You could also call them surprising.

Here are the top films, in no particular order (er, in alphabetical order):

Before the Devil Knows You're Dead
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Into the Wild
Juno
Knocked Up
Michael Clayton
No Country for Old Men
Ratatouille
The Savages
There Will Be Blood

Laura Linney and Philip Seymour Hoffman in The Savages:

Atonement didn't make the list because only American films were considered ('cause, uh, it's the American Film Institute). Other current favorites, like Sweeney Todd, just didn't make it. Well, there's no accounting for taste. But isn't it weird to see Knocked Up and Juno on the same list? And right next to each other like that? I guess unplanned pregnancy is the new black. … continue reading

How can anyone not love Ugly Betty?

Strange as it seems, Freep.com reports that Colombians are not too fond of the American version of their country's show, Yo Soy Betty la Fea. They see the U.S. show as a lame imitation of the original. Fabian Sanabria of Universidad Nacional doesn't mince words in stating his feelings toward Ugly Betty.

"Watching the gringo version would be like reading 100 Years of Solitude in English. It makes no sense."

Hmm. I read One Hundred Years of Solitude in English and it made perfect sense to me. At least it did after I got past the Buendía family lineage. … continue reading

How do you get a bunch of actors to stop talking? Wait, wait: I know this one. Does it involve a pineapple, a screwdriver and a three-legged dog? Oh, sorry; you weren't joking? In all seriousness, the way to get a group of top-flight, big-name actors to finally stop speaking is to stop giving them scripts. A slew of A-list actors are appearing in the new Speechless campaign, a collaboration between the striking members of the Writers Guild of America and members of the Screen Actors Guild.

So far 14 black-and-white, mostly wordless spots have been released, with more on the way. Among the actors already appearing are Oscar winners like Holly Hunter, Susan Sarandon and Sean Penn and TV heavyweights like America Ferrera, Eva Longoria and Ed Asner. Even L Word alums like Rosanna Arquette and Alan Cumming joined in the silence. Here are some of my favorites so far. (For the entire list, check the Speechless channel on Brightcove.) … continue reading

You know when you're having one of those WLT days? No, not a craving for a wombat, lettuce and tomato sandwich — 'cause, ewww. No, I mean a Wishful Lesbian Thinking day. Well, I had one of those the other day when I read the plot description for the new film The Private Lives of Pippa Lee. Robin Wright Penn, Winona Ryder and Julianne Moore have signed on to star in the new drama which, according to Variety, is about Pippa, “a dutiful wife whose husband falls for a younger woman, freeing her to explore her buried sensuality and leading to a very quiet nervous breakdown.” Robin plays Pippa, Winona plays the younger woman, and Julianne plays a place Pippa explores her buried sexuality ... hopefully. See, ain't WLT delicious?

Now, I'm not sure if this case of WLT will pan out. My gay Spidey sense says yes, especially after reading this plot description. But even without a payoff, this is the kind of thinking that has launched a million shippers sites. There are the gold standards (Xena and Gabrielle), the wishful turned wish fulfilled (Willow and Tara) and the just plain awesome (Daria and Jane).

So with that, I thought I'd share a few more of my most recent WLT daydreams, culled from current TV and film. … continue reading